My Mom Died
That might be the hardest 3 words I've ever had to say, write or read.
My mom died. Cancer took her on February 22, 2020.
This is a pain that I cannot comprehend. The worst kind of pain. I miss her every minute. I feel guilty when an hour goes by and I don't feel sad. I know she wouldn't want that. I know she'd want us to celebrate her life, be proud of her strength, and live a life worth living.
But. What happens when you lose your best friend? She's been by my side through every single minute of my entire life. She loved me, laughed with me, cried with me, held me in her arms as I lost my only daughter, stayed with me when my seperation happened, held my hand when my babies were born, and celebrated every single milestone in my life by my side.
I used to call her every single day. Every night like clockwork, I'd pick up the phone, dial that ever familiar number and chat. About mundane, silly, every day things. How many times did I ask her how to make a pie crust or complain about my kids? How many days is it going to take before I don't pick up the phone to call her and realize she isn't there to answer?
Grief is an odd feeling. It hits people so differently. I have good minutes, bad hours, not alot of sleep, and this physical pain that I didn't expect. Every muscle in my body hurts. I feel like my nerves are exposed.
I don't know how to be a girl in a world without a mother.
My mom died. Cancer took her on February 22, 2020.
This is a pain that I cannot comprehend. The worst kind of pain. I miss her every minute. I feel guilty when an hour goes by and I don't feel sad. I know she wouldn't want that. I know she'd want us to celebrate her life, be proud of her strength, and live a life worth living.
But. What happens when you lose your best friend? She's been by my side through every single minute of my entire life. She loved me, laughed with me, cried with me, held me in her arms as I lost my only daughter, stayed with me when my seperation happened, held my hand when my babies were born, and celebrated every single milestone in my life by my side.
I used to call her every single day. Every night like clockwork, I'd pick up the phone, dial that ever familiar number and chat. About mundane, silly, every day things. How many times did I ask her how to make a pie crust or complain about my kids? How many days is it going to take before I don't pick up the phone to call her and realize she isn't there to answer?
Grief is an odd feeling. It hits people so differently. I have good minutes, bad hours, not alot of sleep, and this physical pain that I didn't expect. Every muscle in my body hurts. I feel like my nerves are exposed.
I don't know how to be a girl in a world without a mother.
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