missing things

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wow.  didn't think i'd be saying this so soon.. but i miss work.  i miss the customers, my co-workers, the challenge of working retail, all of it.  most of all i miss the grown up conversation!

i never had any problems when i was off with alex.  but this morning i had a total mental break. i can sense a bit of something lingering... post partum?  some remnants of whatever depression set in after jenna?  a bit of guilt (more on that later...)?  i don't know.  but i'm not a happy momma these days.  however, as sad and lonely as i feel, i know that i'm doing the best thing for my boys and their beautiful faces and smiles let me know that everything i do for them is worth it.

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