february.

it's hard to believe how quickly time can slip away.  i've not been as frequent at blogging as i was last year, but i find that with being back to work, family, and the constant worry that i feel with this pregnancy, i just dn't have as much time to sit down and let things go.

currently 19 weeks pregnant.  i have my ultrasound on monday, which is awesome that i'm gonna get to see this little gummy bear on valentine's day!  we've decided not to find out the baby's gender (unless it's too obvious to miss on the screen), and i'm ok with that decision.  i'm having a hard time with the pregnancy, because the baby doesn't do a ton of kicking, etc, through the day and i only notice it for about an hour in the evening.  it echoes of the way jenna was while she was in my belly.  i don't know how many times i had told the doctors that she was a "lazy baby".

i find that my grief doesn't consume me as much as it once did.  my days aren't filled with thoughts of her and tears.  instead, i can talk about my sweet girl and be proud of her.

so, even though this blog will always have a touch of jenna, angels, and my thoughts about her, it won't be as driven towards that as it was in those first few months.  instead, it will celebrate my WHOLE family.  my smart, funny little boy, my angel baby, my rainbow, and my wonderful hubby :)