Hello Darkness, My Old Friend

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So.  It's been a few months since I wrote anything.  I've been going through the motions.  Living life, like busy working moms do.   Pretending like life is amazingly fantastic.  

But this week.  Oh this week's been a tough one.  I am finding myself in that familiar place.  Dark.  Sad.  Definitely not living my best life.  So many things are hitting me at so many different times, I don't even know how to stand on my own two feet right now.

I'm crying all the time.  I'm picking fights with the man who loves me.  I'm yelling at my kids for mundane things.  I don't want to look at myself in the mirror.  I feel so terribly lonely.  Even surrounded by people all the time, I feel lonely.  Because I don't feel like anyone understands me and what I"m going through.  It's not a good look for anyone.  But I don't know how to change it.  I don't know where to start.  So I think putting it down in writing might be the first step.

I'm approaching the end of my 30's.  I want to be a better version of myself.   But how - how do I shake this never-ending darkness that has seeped into my bones?


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